A Spoonful of Sugar » Foster care

Genetic Lottery

Julie — Tue, 18 May 2010 01:39:10 +0000

You wonder how God decides who goes where? Why was I lucky enough to be born in the US instead of Africa? Why did He choose hardworking intelligent parents for me?

Since my first trip to Africa 4 years ago, I have wondered about the privilege of birthplace. Of course, since African people don’t know anything else, I am not sure that they feel unlucky. There are lots of Americans who don’t realize how lucky they are since the have never seen how other countries live (and CNN doesn’t count!!!)

Now after visiting the home of my recent foster children, I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to be born to parents who don’t hold down jobs, or try to further their education. Although I hope these little guys will have a life that is much better than what they have now; since their parents are continuing the cycle of poverty and neglect, I am not sure that they will be able to do much better. I guess as long as they are happy with their life, who am I to judge!

The sad thing is that whether in Africa or right here in Texas, poverty exists, so I need to be grateful that God chose something different for me. I guess I need to be more thankful for what I have and to do my best to help my neighbors, near and far!!!

Much Better!!!

Julie — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 03:47:58 +0000

I know it seems like I have dropped off the face of the blogging earth, or perhaps after my post about my new foster kids you thought I had finally lost my mind! My two new guys are doing better — they still have a long way to go, but they are adjusting! It’s tough when you go from no rules to a tyrants house–I feel like a tyrant because I have to say” no” a lot! They are both so cute and fun–it’s going to be great having little ones in the house for Easter! Bring on the bunny!!! I wish I could post pictures, but we are bound by that whole privacy thing.

They had a new baby sister born this week, but the judge decided that she would stay with her mother. I don’t think I will ever understand the court system –and sometimes I wonder how judges who never meet these kids are able to make decisions concerning their future. I understand they are listening to the evidence — but perhaps they should meet the kids before they dish out their decisions! Maybe someday I will get the opportunity to ask one of them how they do it and still sleep at night.

Kicking my Rear!!

Julie — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 02:29:27 +0000

I really want to say “kicking my butt” but I thought that might bring an ugly comment from my mom—yet it describes what is happening at my house! We have 2 new foster children, ages 2 and 1—coming from no structure, no discipline, and no attachment–yeow!!! They have been here a month and they are getting better, but I keep having flashback to the twins who were nearly my undoing!!! It’s a good thing they are so cute!!! Wish I could post pictures of their cute faces, but that’s against the old privacy rules–you just have to trust me!

If you see me and I have that haggard look, you will know they are still kicking!!!

Double the Fun!

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 02:25:16 +0000

The Rives household is doubling it’s fun these days!!! Monday we got another little baby girl from CPS. That makes 2 under 3 months–both, just about the same size! (5 pounders!) As close to twins as we’ll get! They are really sweet!

The sad part is that 2 moms are out there without the babies that they just gave birth to. Their loss is our gain–except I guess they are the ones getting the sleep! I had the good baby last night and Wray had the one that cried, I’m going to try to work that deal again tonight! We’re just hoping that big bags under your eyes is in style!!!!!!

I just hope we still have them for Easter—TWO TINY EASTER DRESSES–How fun!!!!!!! I’ll definitely post pictures if that happens!!

Gotta go — I hear crying!

A Great Babysitter!

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 02:44:33 +0000

My little “gran-dog” Chloe has always loved our little foster children. She likes to lay with them in their carseats, checks on them if they cry, and is very protective of them. We had to put her outside one time because she wouldn’t let one of the children’s guardian ad-litem come near him–she was protecting her baby! She was a tremendous help this weekend with little Angie!

Chloe’s going to be so happy when she gets a baby of her own!!!

God is Good!

Julie — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 02:53:11 +0000

In the last two days I have had the privilege of seeing God’s goodness in action—yesterday Wray and I went to visit two of our special friends who were in our home as foster children. For years we prayed that God would give them a terrific forever family, and He came through in a big way! Their mother graciously allows us to remain part of their lives and we love the time we get to spend with them. They are happy, growing, thriving children and we spent a delightful day celebrating Christmas with them. Every time we see them, it is a reminder that God is in the business of answering prayers and taking care of His children.

And speaking of His children, my sweet friend, Rebekah had her fourth surgery in almost as many years. Not only is she a sweet Christian young lady, she is also one of the bravest people I know. Since being diagnosed with a brain tumor in middle school, her entire life has been turned upside down. This last surgery holds the hope of a more normal life for her—God has given her mightily! She is a wonderful testimony of courage and strength–God’s got big plans for her!

Bad days & Good days!

Julie — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 00:58:10 +0000

Sometimes you are a winner and sometimes not so much—yesterday was a bad day—I had to send my 2 little foster guys to a new home; one that was more capable of caring for them than me. Unfortunately, they had issues that I am not really equipped to handle — the hard part is knowing I can’t help them—it feels like a failure! After more than 50 children in my home, you’d think I would be equipped to handle just about anything—the positive in this is that there are people out there to help them, and hopefully they’ll get what they need.

I will just have to get myself ready for the next ones, and hope that I can be the help they need. There are definitely lots of good days ahead!

A Sad Day!

Julie — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 01:43:33 +0000

We have 2 new little foster guys. They are absolutely adorable. Unfortunately, they have been in a very unstable home—I’m not sure we’ll ever know all that these guys have seen. The 6 year old has some MAJOR issues—it makes me so sad that at 6, almost 7 he has so much anger, frustration and unhappiness! He’s had some major meltdowns the last 3 days— I wish all he was worried about was cartoons and who he wanted to come to his birthday party.

It’s just another reminder how fragile childhood is —hold them, love them, and take care of them—not everyone is lucky enough to have parents that care—how sad!

Answered Prayers!

Julie — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 20:59:18 +0000

After being a foster parent for 15 years, there children that I wonder about. There are many that I am confident they are doing fine, but I’d be less than honest if I said I didn’t worry about alot of them. Most of the time I don’t hear about them after they leave my house, so all I can do is just pray for them.

One answered prayer are the sweet angels who came back to visit me this week. Not only did we spend 4 years loving these two, but some serious knee time was spent on their behalf! They are proof positive that God is in the business of answering prayers! They were adopted by a terrific lady who is the perfect mom for them! They have adjusted so well and are thriving in their home! Wray and I were thrilled when they spent the night with us and their mom is great about sending pictures and keeping us posted on their life events.

with Mindy!

After seeing these two awesome kids you might think I’m bragging—and you are so right!!! They are awesome children and I am thrilled and honored that I was and still am a part of their lives! God is good all the time!!!!!!

Soap Box #1

Julie — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 01:26:47 +0000

How does a four month old child end up in foster care with 2 broken femurs? We got a phone call tonight from CPS looking for placement for this child; unfortunately we are not taking any more children until I get back from Africa. Regardless as to whether this child is in my home or not— it still makes my blood boil! Why do people continue to hurt children? Does it ever dawn on them that this is NOT okay?

My prayer is that someday CPS will be out of business— wouldn’t it be great if we didn’t need them anymore because people respected and loved their children. Unfortunately CPS needs foster homes now more than ever– if you’ve ever thought about becoming a foster family, now is the time!!! Call your local Health & Human Services for information (Dallas County 214-951-7902). Don’t say that you can’t do it– anyone can love and take care of a broken little four month old!!! It’s time for everyone to step up to take care of our children!